May 24, 2007

Turning in Truth

Read Psalm 88

"...the darkness is my closest friend." vs. 18

Last night in my Wednesday Night Class we spent a great deal of time dealing with prayer. It is always both interesting and helpful to listen to the stories of others as they discuss the placement of prayer in their lives. I am also reminded in settings such as my class how few people feel confident in praying. The reasons for this lack of confidence are varied. Some have perceptions of God that actually paralyze their ability to turn to Him in honesty. Others have such a low self-confindence that they have actually convinced themselves that they don't know how to pray or that God wouldn't want to listen to them anyhow. The reasons for this lack of confidence can go on and on.

In my understanding of the Christian faith, prayer is probably the central element of spiritual practice within the life of the believer. Our relationship with God--both personally and corporately as a church-- develops a sense of intimacy and closeness as we become accustomed to turning to the Lord in prayer. Prayer is the means by which we acknowledge before God our utter and complete dependence upon his grace for everything we are and do. In essence, prayer is the practice of speaking truthfully to our maker, redeemer, and comforter and listening as God speaks to us a word of direction, conviction, encouragement, and hope.

Over the next few days we will tackle some of the various issues of prayer. However, I felt it necessary to start by speaking of an unhealthy temptation we face as Christians. The temptation I speak of is called "triumphalism." Triumphalism is the false face of spiritual deception that pretends that all is well now that I am a Christian. This is the voice that is constantly telling others that "We are more than conquerors!" "We have power through the blood of Jesus!" "Don't worry about your pain...none of this really matters anyway because we are on our way to Heaven!" There is a certain spiritual smugness to such advice that diminishes the truth of such statements.

The problem is...life isn't always well. Sometimes there is hurt and pain, loss and grief, suffering and trial. Sometimes our worlds fall down all around us. Am I to simply put on a face of false assurance. Do I really feel as though God would be offended by the truth of what I feel in my heart. That is precisely why I have chosen Psalm 88 as our text for the day. The Psalms are extended prayers and poems to God. In one of my bibles I have written next to this Psalm, "Faith in Darkness." This particular Psalm reminds us that sometimes the voice from which we speak to God is one of frustration and brokeness, disappointment and fear. However, it is at this point that faith becomes real...The Psalmist despite his anguish continues to speak to God. What profound faith. The Psalmist doesn't give up on God because all has gone wrong nor does he wear a false mask of spiritual triumphalism that attempts to deceive God. Instead, his faith is recognized in his turning to God in truth and integrity. He declares his brokeness and hurt. He continues to speak even when his words seem brutally offensive. He still believes God is listening...what faith.

Do I believe we are "more than conquerors?" Absolutely...Do I believe we have "power through the blood of Jesus?" Most certainly...However, I don't feel the need to rush people to victory and pass over the cross. Recognition of God's faithfulness in darkness is usually recognized when one has first passed through the "valley of the shadow of death." My life, my prayers are balanced on the hope that the way things are won't be the way things will always be...However, right now matters to God as well. In the present I speak and pray balancing the truth of God's overcoming of this world through Jesus Christ and my own feelings of darkness. Somehow as I continue to speak to God in my darkness, faith becomes real.